Down here sampling all the moonshine and wine I went to three different places and was feeling fine
Yall thought I was playing when I said that in the caption. I was not. Three. Wristband on, glasses on, pink two piece on, and a floor that was already tilting a lil bit by the time somebody took this picture.
Place one. Walked in serious. Read every label like I was gone be tested. Asked the man questions. He answered. I nodded. Sampled six. Bought nothing. Told him I would be back. I was not back.
Place two. Less reading. More sampling. This the one in the picture, all them jars behind me, every flavor of moonshine God ever allowed and a sign that say all jars twenty six dollars like that is a deal. It is not a deal. I bought two.
Place three. Wine. Thought that would slow it down. It did not slow it down. By the third pour I was best friends with a couple from Ohio and had agreed to something I do not remember agreeing to. If yall from Ohio and you reading this, I am not coming to the cookout.
And that is how a grown woman end up feeling fine on a Tuesday afternoon in the mountains with a lanyard round her neck and a bag of jars she got to carry back to the car. Fine. Not drunk. Fine. There is a difference and I was standing right on it.
Somebody get me a water. Toodles.
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